What do you mean I'm wrong?

So there you are, things are going nicely, and everything is falling into what looks like a good plan. You can actually see some major progress taking place and the time for a real change is just around the corner.

And then, ‘John Kerry’ happens. And, no way did anyone see that coming?
You have to believe there is some serious tap dancing going on to resolve this wonderful “Press” moment. As of this morning, Kerry has agreed to ‘shut up’ for a while till this whole bad joke goes away.

(Usually allow for 24 hours for this to fall out of the media scrutiny… then hope someone, somewhere takes the spotlight away. I look for another news breaking story on Anna Nicole to get it down.)

I am neither Democrat nor Republican, though I do have a great admiration for Senator John McCain, and find it fun to watch politicians do what they do so well… trip, stumble and fall. Ah, were it just limited to the wonderful world of politics?

But, let’s face it… the best-laid plans of mice and men, and so on.

It just seems that there will always be that one statement… you just wish had never been said. Stupid comments are not limited to the Terrell Owens and John Kerry’s of this world. Don’t believe me, just sit back and listen.

You would be amazed at what you will see and hear in a given day. Then for even more fun, listen carefully to what comes from your own mouth at times. I have this punch in the gut feeling that as soon as I say something so amazingly stupid, even I flinch at it.

My first boss back in 1976 was an idiot. This is not a personal feeling as much as an observation. He did and said things that would make the most hardened HR veteran flinch.

But, there is one thing that I will always remember. He told me, I believe, after chewing my butt out for being such a bad worker and I quote “ Your work is so bad even the women look better than you.” He told me that whatever I did, never be afraid to say you made a mistake. He was a bit more colorful in his explanation than that, but you get the drift. His point was that once you say, “Yep, I was wrong,” then what is really left to discuss? Sage advice from a guy other supervisors referred to as “Beach Ball”.

So in hindsight, let me say “I was wrong” to many folks over the years. I learned and hopefully gained from it, who knows one of these days, Kerry and the like will learn to say the same thing.

Did You See Something Run Across the Carpet?

I think that there is no better sleep then when the person you share your life, and bed with, gets up early and the bed is all yours. This not to say you don’t love the person any less, but now you can stretch for all your worth. It is the best 10 seconds of my life.

The worst sleep is when the thunder shakes our house and I apparently becoming the rallying point for 2 45-pound dogs and my wife. You couldn’t fit lightning between those three and they take on the powers of the dryer thingy that clings to your clothes after they come out of the dryer. You know, the fabric softener sheet that accompanies you to the store or work, generally in a spot only other people can see.

Let’s talk about parking lots and the premature joy you get when you find the elusive parking place. You begin to pull into the spot, only to discover the shopping cart left by your fellow consumer. What does it take to walk your chubby butt 15 feet to put the cart in the cart-gathering corral? I have watched people struggle to get the cart to sit still so they can abandon the damn thing. It seems to take more effort to be an idiot, than it would take to just put it in its right place.

Do you enjoy waving at the moron at the red light, you know the one who just tailgated you and then blew by you to beat you to the traffic light, or is it just me? My wife has a great saying for these fools, “You should have gotten up earlier.” For some odd reason I get a big kick out of it when they blow by you and cut off a ton of folks to get to the mega church.

We had a mouse in our place the other night. We chased it around with a broom for a bit and looked for it with a flashlight and other assorted weapons of WMDS, Weapons of Mouse Destruction. It stayed well hidden and eluded us; we named it Osama. The following day I went to Lowes and bought some mouse catching gear. My daughter claims every time she calls me, I’m at Lowes. I’m not sure what her point is? There are worse habits. So I placed the sticky traps around the house. I did this with a certain amount of remorse realizing this might be a cruel way to go for Osama. But then given the options I assumed it would not simply leave on it’s own. The next morning I was having coffee and shooting it out with drug runners, Scarface is not for the weak of heart, when I heard what sounded like a scream from our living room. Turns out Osama was caught, well, like a mouse in a trap. Let me be the 1st to say that trying to pickup a sticky mouse trap, with a really pissed off mouse, is not easy. Having your spouse next to you shrieking does nothing to enhance this experience.

Later I called Terminix and requested they come out to look at our rodent issue. The representative was shocked that I had used a sticky trap. He explained that these were very bad could lead to all kinds of diseases. It never occurred to me to actually leave the mouse in the trap for days, but hey he is the professional. The following day the “Pro from Dover” showed up and inspected out mouse infested home. He reported back that I had caught the only culprit and that the sticky traps worked really well with Peanut Butter. Apparently he was not aware of the company stance on sticky traps.