Nancy, baby..let's talk

Pelosi bans smoking near House floor
1 hour, 49 minutes ago
WASHINGTON - New House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is snuffing out one of Congress' enduring prerogatives, still cherished by some lawmakers — the right to smoke near the floor of the House. Pelosi, D-Calif., announced Wednesday that effective immediately, House members would no longer be able to light up in the ornate Speaker's Lobby off the House floor where lawmakers mingle during votes

You self-righteous cow…


OK, I smoke. I get that I am one of the millions of self destructive, nicotine poisoned, bottom feeders that Ms Pelosi has issue with. I get that the taxes on smokes are beyond belief. We are looked down on, yelled at and shunned. We rate somewhere above border crossers and used car salesman. We are a scourge on modern society and should not be allowed to be near proper society.

Things I hear and the answers I would love to say:

“Those aren’t good for you!!”

Really, but it does keep the weight down, want one?

“Must you smoke here?”

Well I do now

“You smell of smoke!!”

Nice isn’t it?

“Your second hand smoke is harming me.”

Move.

“Your are putting unnatural things in your body.”

And those are soy implants??

You think most smokers don’t think it’s a bad habit? We do, and as a rule we can be pretty darn polite about it. A lesson some non-smokers might give a chance.

Year’s back I belonged to a gym in Southern California. It was a fairly large complex, 3 stories high and an acre plus in the back for a pool. The entire building was a glass front.
One day after a workout I opted to some laps and then lay out by the pool. I decided to go to the farthest part of the property so I could have a smoke while I relaxed.
Yea, I get the irony.
As I got comfortable in the lawn chair and lit my cigarette I faced the back of the gym. On the third floor was the row of treadmills that overlooked the pool. As I struck the match, I noticed the hard stare of Bambi Biceps from her perch on the treadmill. Even from the distance the look was unquestionable. I watched as she left her perch and made her way to the set of stairs leading down. I timed her. It took 8 minutes and 2 smokes for her to reach the bottom floor that lead to the entrance to the pool. Another 4 minutes to walk the length of the property to where I was “relaxing”. She wasted no time explaining how I was causing her harm by my selfish act and would ask the management team to have me removed from the premises.
As I intently listened, I could barely make out what she was saying over the sounds of 8 lanes of traffic on the 405 and the 737’s stacked up trying to land at John Wayne airport, it struck me, this was the dumbest butt chewing I had ever taken. It made me realize then that no attempt at civility would ever work smokers.

Hey Nance, maybe you could tackle some real issues and question. Maybe you could work on the little stuff, maybe a well-mannered and helpful civil servant? Anywhere would be a start. Maybe the butthead at the passport office might be easier to deal with if you let him have a smoke break once in awhile?